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Inner Child, Mature Adult

Inner child, mature adult

April 2026

Chinese Gardens

Over the past couple of months, I’ve been holding the intention to be more aware of my inner child and to give her what she might want, need, or find enjoyable in any particular moment.

This impulse was sparked by an experience I had in mid-February, after deciding to do a little something to celebrate the Lunar New Year. I set aside an hour to walk around Chinatown in Sydney, without any specific agenda. As I passed by the Chinese Garden of Friendship (aka the Chinese Gardens), I stopped to admire the trees, ponds and architecture of the building from the outside. After noting that the entrance fee was almost quadruple what it used to be when I’d visited previously, I turned around to continue walking. Then I noticed a little pull to go back. It was a bit like being tugged at the sleeve by a kid who wants to stay somewhere longer.

I faced the entrance again, imagining what I’d do if I were taking a young child out for a fun adventure. What if she asked to go to the Chinese Gardens? When I tuned into what I felt was my own inner child, there was a clear wanting to look inside. Would I turn down her request just because of a small entrance fee? Of course not!

Once my ticket had been bought, I decided to be led by my inner child for the entire journey, not just to get through the front door. That childlike part of me relished the sight of willow trees and various plants, the koi carp and ducks in the ponds, as well as the pavilions and sculptures on display.

Upon spotting a tea house inside the gardens, my inner child perked up. I looked at the menu where there appeared to be nothing substantial to eat for a plant-based meal. As I turned away, that same little pull – or tug at my sleeve – led me to reconsider. Again, I realised that if I had a child in my care who wanted to go to this restaurant, then I wouldn’t be so quick to leave. I went to a staff member and asked if anything could be made vegan. He said he was sure the chef would oblige, then invited me to sit down while he went to the kitchen.

I made a bee line for a table in a relatively dark quiet corner, then noticed my inner child’s preference to settle in the centre of the seating area, in a bright spot facing the scenery outside. Okay then, I thought. Not where I’d normally sit, but your wish is my command! Soon afterwards, the chef came out to say that the menu could be adapted, before making some suggestions about what he was able to prepare. After quickly checking what my inner child was hungry for, I requested something that was not on the menu, nor suggested by the chef. If I’d only been focused on feeding my adult self, I doubt I would have been so bold! Yet the chef happily agreed to create what was described. A meal was brought out containing salad, fresh fruit, and perhaps one of the best fried tofu dishes I’ve ever had – it had a delicate flavour and was super soft on the inside, while crispy on the outside.

After eating, I took out a map that had been given at the front counter. I set out to explore the gardens, planning to walk through every part now that I was already inside. Surprisingly, at a certain point I felt that same tug of the inner child, this time leading away from the gardens. Wait, don’t you want to see all these other things first, before we leave? I wondered. Yet my inner child had seen enough and was ready to go. So off we went.

Bad Movie

One week later, I thought back to that inner child experience. I’d been visiting with family for dinner, and someone suggested watching a movie afterwards. Normally I would be keen, but that night I was tired and felt like going home to sleep early. Also, many of my family and other loved ones enjoy watching “bad” movies – as in, badly acted, badly made films – for the simple reason that they are just so hilariously bad. I prefer watching high quality movies but can still appreciate the fun of seeing a bad one occasionally. On this night though, I really didn’t want to. For the sake of pleasing others, I agreed to watch the movie, stayed up late, then didn’t feel well the next morning. It took several days for me to get back to normal because I’d let myself get run down.

If I’d been responsible for a child who was sleepy and wanted to go home, I wouldn’t have kept her up late or forced her to watch a movie she didn’t want to see, even if that meant disappointing others. It made me curious about what life would be like if I listened to my inner child more often, nurturing her not only during fun outings, but in everyday life.

Mature Adult

After committing to care for my inner child in different situations, it became clear that there are some things she does much better than my “normal” adult self. She knows clearly what she wants and is good at asking for it. She inspires generosity, eager to give to others as well as to myself. She appreciates things that I would otherwise see as mundane. She finds it easier to rest, even when sleep is elusive (rather than trying to mentally solve problems in the middle of the night as I’ve often done, she’ll appreciate the pillow, the warmth of the blanket, and remain lying contentedly on the mattress, whether or not sleep does eventually come). She is also quite devotional and finds it easy to meditate.

Unexpectedly, my inner child came to the rescue just this week while I was wrestling with a decision. I’d been mulling over this issue for ages, wanting to embark on a certain adventure while not feeling my intuition saying yes to it. Ah, the dilemma of wanting something that does not yet feel aligned! I saw how I’d been hoping that something would change so my intuition could get on board, rather than just listen to what it was telling me.

Eventually I asked my inner child how she felt about it, and the answer was a clear no. I presumed she might want to try this new thing due to her openness and curiosity, but no. She wasn’t concerned about what would be missed by staying at home, or whether the opportunity might ever come up again. In fact, it wasn’t just “no”, it was more like, “Please, no. Please let’s rest, and just have fun here, now.”

What happened next is a bit embarrassing to admit, but I felt led to Channel for confirmation. While I’ve often opened inspirational books to a random page for guidance when feeling stuck, I’ve never done this with my own. Yet, I followed the impulse and held the following conundrum in my mind as I held the book in my hands: If we can manifest what we want, what do we do when we want something that our intuition doesn’t agree with?

I opened Channel to page 117 and found my answer:

"It might seem unnecessary to surrender to our crazy intuitive hunches or spiritual guidance if we have the power to consciously manifest whatever we choose. However, most of us have heard the phrase, “Be careful what you wish for, you might get it.” Those words themselves highlight the possibility of things going wrong after we receive what we want. The problem is that we can’t always assume in advance what will be best for us … To push our own agenda without checking in to see if our intuition agrees is putting ourselves at risk of making choices that won’t bring us long-term fulfilment.

"Rather than striving to figure out what we think we want and attempt to make it happen above all else, an alternative approach would be to acknowledge what the problem or desire appears to be, and then surrender it to our intuition or higher guidance, then stay unattached to the outcome and see what happens."

I wrote this over eight years ago (and had clearly forgotten it). So, not only did my inner child seem to guide me to these paragraphs, but they were literally words of advice from my younger self.   

Ironically, I seem to be a much more mature adult when I connect with my inner child. I take better care of myself, show greater understanding towards others, and feel more responsible in life generally. In essence, our inner child could be considered synonymous with our intuitive self, due to those common qualities of deep knowing, wonder, and natural spiritual connection. Whether we call it the inner child, intuition, or something else, it seems worth paying attention to.

What does your inner child want you to know?


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